SearchingSirocco

 Day 1 - March 1 - 2022 I have finally started my journey of no fap and no smoke where I have vowed to quit these two things forever.  It was not done by me but it was done by the God.  Shivji, Krishniji, Hanuman ji and My eternal Goddess Sai Pallavi came inside my stomach and sat there.  Krishna ji started his chakra in vertical postition to which Hanuman ji attached his gada and Shivji made it run. Sai pallavi lit the diya and made the wheel run.  I fapped last night and smoked one last time and it was not pleasreful. It was my last time so I wanted it to be very special. However it turned to be a not so exciting adventure.  But anyways, I meditated for a long time last night which is a relief for me.  The new life begins now. 

Chloe Bubba as I like to call him dearly has only one goal in life and that is to shred love to everyone. She cannot live without any other human being.  She always needs someone around.  She loves us most, by most I mean second. Her first love is food and she often gets angry on people who come between her and her food. We have also been victims of her growling.  There is something in her face which makes me want to kiss her the moment I see her.  I don't have an experience of having my own kid till now but I think I would not love even my daughter as much as i love her. I can give my life for her.  But that is life, isn't it? You feel the emotion you are feeling right now cannot be overpowered by any other emotions and then something else happens and you forget about this emotion.  I am pretty sure that the day I will have my own daughter, I will love her more than anything else. I can say it because I have listened to the experience of other people and they say that having a

 I don't have many subscribers and I don't have many views on my channel but yet I knew somehow that i have to keep posting videos like every day to get more views and get more people to subscribe to my channel.  The reason being, First I needed to get into the habit of making youtube videos and second it will increase my channel.  I treat my youtube video channel as a shop where I knew I have to post a lot of videos for the time when people will come to my channel and see that there is so much content on my channel and will subscribe to it.  I can almost see the results now. If I ask someone for an interview than I see that they don't decline my request.  The second most important thing that I have to start doing now is to start approaching girls and talk to them. The more girls I will talk to the better my communication skills will get.   There are so many goals I have listed for myself that i often confuses me as well. But the going is good and I am enjoying the journey.

 I wanted to take some interviews on my youtube channel but that didn't happen because of an unusual amount of rain in Lucknow due to which there were huge light fluctuations. I wonder if these sudden weather changes is because of worldwide covid lockdown reasons. You know weather has improved over time.  Maybe this is just my observation.  I love rain and I would love that it continues for a longer period of time but I know that the Winter is coming and rain might be an indication of the climate change.  It is very difficult to control yourself when there is rain and you want to eat something but you can't because first it is COVID and second your stomach is nearly always upset.   I have to improve my health and I will start doing it soon.

Damn It. people just don't want to work hard and here I am trying to bust my ass to become successful. I have a target of 100 crore rupees and I feel that now the only thing that remains in my mind all the time is that I want to become a billionaire. I have started blogging again. Purely for one reason.  I want to write more. But this time it is going to be small steps at one time.  I am only going to write blogs of 200 words each and won't target 2000 words like last time which actually demotivated me from writing anything at all.  I think everyone should start small and that is how one reaches the biggest goals of life. Writing is something I want to do my entire life and for that, I will keep on doing the writing work that I am doing right now.  Stil my English is not that great despite me trying to very hard at times to improve it. Where is the motivation? After a while I guess we all lose motivation in doing things which don't matter in a longer period of time.  

Today as I was jogging, i realized that i have a mask on my face. Due to lockdown, i don't go anywhere without the mask. Not because I am too cautious about my health but my parents, they shout at high decibels if i don't wear them. Looking at the average number of people who are getting corona and the number that are getting killed i can tell you that I am not anymore afraid of corona. Not many people are dying of it. More people die of accidents on road than they die from corona. Europe is even considering me for Nobel price for my noble research. hehehe.. Anyways, so i removed the mask to breathe some air because while you are jogging you need as much air as much possible. Another ground breaking discovery of mine. So i removed it and wufff... what a breath of freah sir having scent of flowers, grass, pollens, fresh oxygen, also carbon dioxide as it was early morning mixed with dust, enemy pollens and piss smell from nearby toilet gave me a feeling that life is much b